How are you feeling today and do you manage to get a bit of Self-Care into your daily routine?
Self-Care is an expression thrown around so much these days isn’t it? But, it really is a practice you should incorporate into your daily life.
For me, I feel so much better after a 30 minute walk surrounded by nature, should it be in the park, or anywhere with plenty of greenery. I enjoy walking in a nice quiet environment! I always feel refreshed after a brisk walk as it clears my mind. Throughout a walk it gives me time to reflect on things, to admire the beauty of nature and to just be with me!
If you work in an office, even taking a 15 minute walk outside for some air during lunch can make all the difference. It’s about getting into a little habit.
What form of Self-Care do you enjoy?
Self-Care can mean absolutely anything, it can be sitting reading a good book uninterrupted for 20-30 minutes. It can be playing your favourite instrument, meditating or going for a swim. Even a walk on the beach or taking time out to enjoy your favourite cup of tea/coffee without the rushing about. Oh, do I love sitting down with that obligatory chai latte. Something so simple can be so powerful; when you let it! Anything that makes you feel happier/relaxed.
Dedicating time for you
Starting a habit that focuses on your needs should become priority; and a good habit at that. We live in a world where life can be so busy and we often forget to put our own needs first. If you are in a constant state of ‘rush’ then you find it hard to focus on what you really want/need. Even 20 minutes each day will make all the difference as you are becoming aware of your needs. After a while it will become habitual.
To build a habit, you need to practice it.
Make it easy
If you find you are feeling a bit overwhelmed/stressed at times then take a step back and concentrate on your breathing. How does your breathing feel? What is worrying you?
Inhaling deeply (filling those lungs) and exhaling slowly a few times should help you to connect with yourself and to feel more relaxed. It’s so simple and yet again, powerful!
You should ALWAYS be priority
Remember: YOU are always priority and taking that time out to practice Self-Care every day is so important for your physical and emotional well-being. Think about what it is that YOU enjoy. How can it become a habit? Could it be a 20 minute walk during lunch. Could it be reading a good book or sitting down and being completely present with that hot cup of tea/coffee. Whatever it is; make it a habit going forward. You owe it to your body and mind. Learn to become more self-aware and to tap into what makes you feel good. It really is about the simple things in life.
So, you’re scrolling through FB or Insta, having a little old harmless browse – next thing you know you compare yourself to others and your mood suddenly changes (oh boy have I been there) you just keep torturing yourself, checking out profiles, switching to auto-pilot and scrolling: making yourself feel worse! Does this sound familiar to you?
It’s not surprising why you feel bad after a browsing session when it comes to social media. Selfies are plastered everywhere, filters are on hand and those perfect (well edited) life snaps are shown. The “like” button has also become gold to so many people. The list is endless. On the other hand, however, social media can be a great platform for promoting your business, sharing your creativity, highlighting important issues and raising awareness on so many important causes/subjects.
We’re in a time where everything is done online now and working from home is so much more common since the pandemic.
When my relationship with social media started
When I first became acquainted with FB back in 2007 (yes I’m over 40) I have to admit I loved it. Social media was a new way to connect with others. I loved checking into places, posting photos of my hols, dinner (I know) and basically sharing the snaps I “wanted” the world to see. Oh did that soon change.
When Social Media becomes unhealthy
Now, when I look back, social media was not one bit healthy for my mental well-being. When the novelty of this new platform had worn off I was comparing myself to others, and my self-esteem dipped whenever I was scrolling. Do you find your mood changing when you’re scrolling for eternity? Yep, we’ve all been there!
My goodness I remember well before mobiles and the Internet and managed quite well. In todays world, don’t you feel lost if your phone isn’t attached to those hands? I’m so much more mindful these days with social media and deleted my personal social media accounts many years ago (I just had to and feel much more happier/content) I still have FB and Insta, but more for hobbies and work.
You’re in a time where social media is so powerful and addictive. Selfies are huge and trying to master the right pose/look can be exhausting/stressful. Try not to compare your life (I know it’s easier said than done) we’re all unique and brilliant in our own ways. You have your weaknesses and strengths. Build on your strengths and what you enjoy doing and what makes you feel good.
According to NCHR (National Center For Health Research) 45% of adolescents have reported to being online “almost constantly,” whereas 44% stated being online several times a day. This is a huge percentage of younger people spending their time online on a daily basis – and is bound to have a negative impact to your mental well-being. However, a 2018 survey report (NCHR, 2018) has stated how 31% of adolescents found a positive impact from social media use and connecting with others. But, 25% of adolescents found social media to have such a negative impact.
Researchers have also shown how social media can disrupt sleep (NCHR, 2018) I can vouch for this myself, as I used to take my phone to bed (I stopped that years ago) put it under my pillow and if I woke during the night would have a quick check: then the dreaded scrolling started. Leave your phone downstairs at night or put it into a drawer. Get that proper nights sleep your body and mind needs.
Finding the right balance
There are positives to using social media when you get that balance right and become more aware when online.
If you’re a sensitive person (sensitive person myself I may add) with low self-esteem and you find yourself feeling low after you spend quite a bit of time scrolling: then take a step back.
7tips on balancing a healthy social media life
1. Ask yourself these questions before going online:
How do I feel?
What can I do instead?
What exactly is making me feel worse?
How is this beneficial?
2. Delete apps from your phone, so you don’t have it handy to constantly check/scroll.
3. Follow positive well-being accounts, these will help you to see the positives. Follow genuine accounts focused on your wellbeing.
4. If it gets too much or overwhelming then take a little break from it. Or even dedicate a day with no social media use every week.
5. Take up a hobby you enjoy and follow accounts you have an interest in.
6. Go outdoors (leave the phone at home) Spend time in nature to recharge your own batteries and connect with yourself. There is so much beauty out there and outside of social media. Breathe in that fresh air!!
7. Become more aware of your feelings when online. Check in with yourself: ask yourself do I feel ok doing this? Set yourself a time limit when online.
Social media can be so addictive and you can spend wasted hours scrolling.
Channel your energy into what YOU really enjoy. What makes you smile?
It’s ok to take a break and remember to always be kind to yourself. Step by step you can change a habit. You are more than enough. You really, really are.
I feel so much happier not having a personal social media account anymore and I limit my time spent when browsing on the phone. I’m more aware when online. I channel my energies into what I enjoy, which is being with my family, writing, coaching and poetry.
Talk to someone if it all gets a bit too much, it’s ok to share how you’re feeling with someone you trust – it’s not a weakness but a strength to open up (and at your own pace too)
Thank you for checking out my post and let me know what your relationship with social media is like.
Do you need to find a healthier social media balance?
Do you need the motivation and discipline to move forward with your goals?
This is a photo of myself, my race bib and my medal after I ran and completed Dublin Marathon in 2013 (I ran my first Dublin Marathon in 2010)
How did I feel? Delighted, relieved, exhausted, sore, but proud!
How did I make this happen?
I spent 4 solid months training 6 days per week, booked a few 5k and 10k races as part of my training plan and followed a great marathon book (that book was my training and nutrition coach)
Now, I was working full-time and studying part-time too. How did I manage all this and was it a bit crazy? Heck, yes it was a bit crazy, but, I planned well and followed that 4 month plan to a tee. I had a great marathon training buddy (she kept me motivated and if you’ve trained for a marathon you will know how those long runs can be very lonely on your own) and had a supportive other half!
Looking back it was hard work (results always take determination, belief in yourself and discipline) and there were plenty of times where I felt like giving up, shed tears and my confidence was knocked. But, I would always focus on the end goal and visualized myself running over that finishing line. That picture was always in my mind.
If you want it, you can fly,
You just have to trust ‘you’ a lot
When you set goals, you need to have a structured plan, believe in yourself and then visualize it.
Give yourself a pep talk!
Whenever you lack the motivation to move forward with your goals, ask yourself:
What can I do differently?
Why did I start?
How can I make this work going forward?
Running a marathon is HARD WORK and you need to put in that time and commitment. Build yourself up and pace yourself.
Like everything, most of it is all in the mind. What you feed yourself mentally certainly affects your performance.
Be kind to yourself with that self-talk!
When you put in the work, then you get results. It’s all in the preparation, believing in yourself, doing the research and being disciplined.
Keep checking in with yourself and reflect.
Plan of action and final thoughts
I make sure I follow a plan, set goals, have a clear vision and I work hard at what I set out to achieve.
Should you be training for a marathon, working towards a big job promotion, changing career, wanting to lose weight or anything that involves commitment; you need to put in the work, be disciplined, prepare, plan and visualize that end result! But, being kind to yourself too.
What changes do you need to make going forward?
How can you make that change happen?
You can do whatever you put your mind to. Believe in yourself, lace up those trainers and get starting!
How is your day going? Are you feeling rested? Would you like to gain clarity and become more relaxed, focused, confident and happier In your daily life going forward?
If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you will know I certified as a coach earlier this year. Welcome, if this is your first visit (check out my home page http://www.bernieegerton.com to read more on the coaching experience, my credentials, blog posts and testimonials) and thank you to those of you who support, encourage and read my blog. I’m always grateful for this blogging community!
To build up more on my knowledge and practical coaching experience; I’m offering 2 free (online) coaching sessions per person, In a warm, friendly, safe and non-judgemental coaching environment.
When you have a growth mindset, you are always looking at ways to improve yourself, your talents and you learn from your mistakes. You’re a sucker for learning new things. But, you’re not being too hard on yourself during the process either.
I used to be extremely hard on myself and if things didn’t go as planned, oh boy would I spend forever overthinking the situation, beating myself up; and my confidence would plummet. I believed if I wasn’t good at something, then that was it (fixed mindset).
But now, with a growth mindset I reflect on the situation, write in my journal (to process) have my own coaching (to gain clarity), take courses (learning) and practice gratitude daily
I’m constantly learning and brushing up on my skills to become better. Oh don’t get me wrong, there are days where low confidence comes knocking right on that door. I answer it, listen to it, question it; but I don’t spend time dwelling or entertaining those thoughts (not like I used to)
Personal development is huge to me, and part of my daily life. You learn, progress, reflect and grow. Every. Single. Day.
What areas need training/improving in my life?
How can I banish those limiting beliefs?
What little acts makes me feel positive?
What are my core values?
Moving forwardwhen you hit a standstill
At times we might reach a standstill with our goals; therefore struggling to move forward. Am I good enough, what’s the point; and why do I not see instant results? Do these questions sound familiar?
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving” – Albert Einstein
Remember, results take time – and don’t give up or lose heart. As the saying goes “Rome wasn’t built in a day” and it wasn’t. You are only human, and it’s really ok to have off days.
Get back on that horse, keep going, push through the pain barrier and remember why you started in the first place!
Visualise that end result.
How can I move forward with my goals?
Why am I losing confidence and doubting myself in the first place?
What action do I need to take?
Keep going and don’t give up!
Life is short. And, the more we spend worrying and doubting our capabilities, the more stressed we become and you avoid following your true path in life!
Change always starts with you, when you commit and believe! Keep learning, brush up on your strengths and take your time.
Believe in yourself, work from within and grow – just like that seed waiting to blossom and flourish ❤